Sunday, August 04, 2013

Landlords and Leaf Blowers:The Holders Of The Infinite Truth

 photo c51c2d80-3312-492a-b1b2-abe2b9cc9b8b_zps6b659c84.jpg I've been thinking about the Charles Bukowski's Shoelaces & The Staypuft Marshmallow Man a lot & how one big strategically placed ooey gooey foot could put an end to this madness or at the very least make it more interesting.

The home that was once my sanctuary has become a hostage situation.

There is some construction happening in our area and our obtuse landlord insists that having a clear driveway is more important than the sanity and well being of the residents who pay to live here.
 
So the cacophony of the daily construction is augmented by the dastardly incessant droning whrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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of not one but several leaf blowers wielded by faceless men who wear goggles and masks to avoid inhaling the tornadoes of muck and grit they stir up with their evil vortex of howling winds.

 photo f51048e3-6607-47ca-a089-03297e136c20_zpsb78df2d5.jpgThe dirt doesn't go anywhere except up into the air or off to the gutter where it is invariably tracked back onto the precious PRECIOUS driveway by the trucks and feet of construction goons who are paid to pound, not care. Tuesdays are especially exciting because the landscapers show up en masse at 730 to blow leaves and The Blowers of The Dirt appear not too long after so it is a symphony of destruction and eternal...the whrrrrrrrrring sometimes lasting 2 to 3 hours. It destroys the peace, nerves and lung capacity. They blow the dirt and the leaves hither and yon but never truly away just temporarily out of the way. Sisyphus would be impressed by this absurd and futile display. I have begged and pleaded for mercy , even going so far as to find an affordable electric street sweeper. However the pleas, though acknowledged, have been summarily ignored. 

Landlords and leaf blowers are The Holders Of The Infinite Truth and that truth is: that it is very important to LOOK like your doing something productive even if the reality is that you aren't.

Who was it that said "Delusion is a goddess?" Her feet so dainty she would never deign to put them on the ground. Preferring instead to tread on the soft squishy heads of men, who looking up, are easily led astray? Yeah, that.

SCORE: Driveway - 0 Humanity - 0 Delusions - 2 and then some

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